Impress Me
by Catherine Parr
Summary: There is no way Lily is going to give in without a fight. All James has to do is impress her. Easy, right? Wrong. James is going to need all the help he can get. Unfortunately, Sirius is there with some rather unhelpful advice. Can James get the girl?


Songfic: That Don't Impress Me Much by Shania Twain

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the following characters or settings; only the plot is mine. The characters and setting belong to JK Rowling and the song belongs to the ever talented Shania Twain.

AN: I love this Shania Twain song and thought it fit James perfectly. Let me know what you think! :)

"Evans!"

Lily turned to see James Potter sauntering out of the Great Hall behind her. His hair was gelled to messy perfection and his smirk exuded arrogance. The standard Gryffindor tie had been loosened and the top few buttons of his standard issue white Hogwarts shirt were unbuttoned; his sleeves were casually rolled up to his elbows and his heavy outer robes had been discarded. She barely controlled her instinct to roll her eyes. Had he been anyone else she would have had to contain a swoon. James Potter was far too attractive for his own good, and he knew it. She'd had a crush on him for a while but, being Lily Evans, she couldn't give in without a fight.

"Yes Potter?"

"Come to Hogsmeade with me this weekend."

"Are you asking if I want to go or are you telling me?"

"Um…both, I guess?" She was shocked to see some of the arrogant confidence disappear as he said this.

"Wrong answer, Potter. If you want me to go out with you, you'll just have to impress me. Fat chance of that happening." This last bit was whispered under her breath as Lily turned and sauntered towards the Heads common room, her skirt swishing as her hips moved from side to side.

_I've known a few guys who thought they were pretty smart__  
><em>_But you've got being right down to an art__  
><em>_You think you're a genius, you drive me up the wall__  
><em>_You're a regular original, a know-it-all__  
><em>_Oh-oo-oh, you think you're special__  
><em>_Oh-oo-oh, you think you're something else_

_Okay, so you're a rocket scientist__  
><em>_That don't impress me much__  
><em>_So you got the brain but have you got the touch__  
><em>_Don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright__  
><em>_But that won't keep me warm in the middle of the night__  
><em>_That don't impress me much_

_I never knew a guy who carried a mirror in his pocket__  
><em>_And a comb up his sleeve, just in case__  
><em>_And all that extra hold gel in your hair oughtta lock it__  
><em>_'Cause Heaven forbid it should fall outta place_

_Oh-oo-oh, you think you're special__  
><em>_Oh-oo-oh, you think you're something else_

_Okay, so you're Brad Pitt__  
><em>_That don't impress me much__  
><em>_So you got the looks but have you got the touch__  
><em>_Don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright__  
><em>_But that won't keep me warm in the middle of the night__  
><em>_That don't impress me much_

"She said what Prongs?" Sirius asked, worried about his friend who was currently pacing about the 7th year boys dormitory. Remus was in the hospital still recovering from an unusually violent full moon the night before and Peter was meeting with his Potions tutor (obviously not possessing the natural academic talents of his friends).

"She said that if I wanted a chance to go out with her I'd have to _impress_ her. Whatever that means."

"Did you try the signature Marauder move? The one bound to bring any girl to her knees?"

"Why didn't I think of that?" James said, stopping his pacing. "Padfoot, that's brilliant!"

"I try." Sirius grinned cheekily. "Now, if you really want to impress her then you'll need to pay more attention to how you look. That move only works if you already look perfect. Why don't you practice, just to be sure."

James paused, cleared his face of any expression, closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Suddenly the arrogant smirk was back in place. James ran his fingers through his unruly hair, coiffing it perfectly while throwing a flirty wink in Sirius' direction.

"Excellent work, Prongs. Evans won't know what hit her."

James sauntered into the Heads common room a few days later and saw Lily hard at work on the couch. She was absent mindedly chewing on the end of her quill while twirling a lock of hair around her finger, completely engrossed in her transfiguration reading. James' mouth went suddenly dry when he saw what she was wearing. Lily was dressed in tiny red cotton boxer shorts and a black tank top. Her fiery red hair glinted with the firelight. James didn't think she had ever looked more beautiful. He dropped his bag on the floor and Lily looked up, startled by the sudden noise.

She smirked when she saw him there. There was no denying that she was attracted to him, who wouldn't be? Unlike the other girls, however, Lily wanted James to earn her affections. He would have to prove to her that he was everything she was looking for in a man, not just that smug, arrogant, bullying toerag he had always been. She had seen the changes he had undergone but wanted him to realize she was interested in a serious relationship, not just some fling.

James was so distracted by her smile that he nearly forgot the signature Marauder move. He paused, ran his fingers through his messily gelled hair, and threw her a lascivious wink.

"Hey Evans."

Lily had seen the sudden interest James had taken in his appearance. She had seen him reach into his pocked for a mirror and comb he had started carrying everywhere he went. Obviously he had misinterpreted her request for him to impress her.

"James. You know this is not what I meant when I told you that you'd have to impress me. If all I wanted was physical attraction you would have won me over years ago. You'll still need to impress me. Good luck."

James was shocked by the confidence her parting words and smirk had exuded. As he saw her climb the stairs to her room, he couldn't do anything but stare, dumbfounded. As her shapely form disappeared behind her door, he was suddenly aware of the tightness in his pants. Damn, Lily Evans had somehow just gotten hotter.

_You're one of those guys who likes to shine his machine__  
><em>_You make me take off my shoes before you let me get in__  
><em>_I can't believe you kiss your car good night__  
><em>_C'mon baby tell me, you must be jokin', right_

_Oh-oo-oh, you think you're special__  
><em>_Oh-oo-oh, you think you're something else_

_Okay, so you've got a car__  
><em>_That don't impress me much__  
><em>_So you got the moves but have you got the touch__  
><em>_Don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright__  
><em>_But that won't keep me warm in the middle of the night_

_That don't impress me much__  
><em>_You think you're cool but have you got the touch__  
><em>_Don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright__  
><em>_But that won't keep me warm on the long, cold, lonely night__  
><em>_That don't impress me much_

_Okay, so what do you think you're Elvis or something...__  
><em>_Oo-Oh-Oh__  
><em>_That don't impress me much!_

_Oh-Oh-Oh-Oh-No__  
><em>_Alright! Alright!_

_You're Tarzan!__  
><em>_Captain Kirk maybe.__  
><em>_John Wayne.__  
><em>_Whatever!__  
><em>_That don't impress me much!_

"What do you mean it didn't work? That move has lured many a witch into my bed. How didn't it work?" Sirius joined James in his pacing. He was shocked that his signature move had failed to seduce Lily Evans. She was a woman, after all; how could she resist?

"I don't know mate. She told me that if all she wanted was for me to be physically attractive then she would have said yes long ago. She says I still haven't impressed her. What do I do now, Padfoot? We're running out of time!" James said, frustrated.

"Just let me think, Prongs." The two boys sat in confused silence for the next few minutes.

"I've got it, Prongs!" Sirius exclaimed, jumping to his feet. "What is the one thing that you are the best at?"

"Umm…I don't know Sirius. Getting rejected by Lily?"

"No, don't be daft. Quidditch! All you need to do is impress Lily with your skills on the broom and, voila, she's all yours."

"You know Sirius, that just might work. Thanks Mate!"

James took off down the stairs, out the portrait, and down to the Quidditch pitch. As captain he had access to the locker rooms whenever he wanted. He mounted his broom and took off toward the Heads Tower, located adjacent to the Gryffindor Tower. He saw Lily's silhouette in the open window.

"Lily!"

"James? What in Merlin's name are you doing out there? Are you trying to get yourself killed?"

"Don't worry, Lily. I won't fall." James moved closer. "Lily, would you come flying with me?"

"Uhh, I don't know James." She replied, wringing her hands. "I don't really like flying…or heights…"

"There is no need to worry, I'll make sure you don't fall. How can you say you don't like flying if you've never tried?"

"Promise you'll bring me back if I don't like it?" Her green doe-like eyes looked into his expectantly.

"I promise." James said, extending his hand to her. She stepped hesitantly onto the window ledge, too scared to look down. She swung her right leg over the broom behind James and wrapped her arms tightly around his waist. She found herself blushing as she felt his hard abs clench beneath his thin cotton shirt.

James suddenly took off, eliciting a high pitched shriek from Lily. Her grip around his waist tightened as he soared over the grounds towards the Black Lake. They spent the next half an hour in silence as he showed her what, exactly, he loved about flying. He showed her all of his favorite places and demonstrated all of his favorite maneuvers.

As they made their way back towards the Head's Tower, James became aware of the weight of her head leaning against his shoulder blade. For a minute he thought she had fallen asleep but then he felt her breath hot against his neck.

"James, can we go back now? I should really get to bed."

"Of course, Lily." He turned and hovered outside her bedroom window. She quickly climbed back inside.

"Thank you, James. I had a really lovely time." A delicate blush covered her cheeks as she spoke. Suddenly she seemed to come to her senses and her nervous smile turned into a slight smirk as she said, "Close, but not quite James. You haven't impressed me yet. Everyone knows you're the best Quidditch player in Hogwarts. Better luck next time." With that she closed the window and the drapes, not trusting herself not to go back out there and kiss him.

"Padfoot, wake up!"

"Prongs? What is it? It's 1 o'clock in the bloody morning. Couldn't this wait 'til morning?"

"It's Lily. I took her flying. I really thought I had her. But she said that everyone knows I'm good at Quidditch. It wasn't impressive enough. I really don't know what to do now."

"I don't know mate. But there's nothing we can do now. How about we ask Remus in the morning? He seems to understand girls. Alright?"

"Thanks Padfoot."

The next morning James walked out of the Great Hall after breakfast and began his routine walk to Advanced Transfiguration. He was deep in thought when he felt his shoulder jostle another student going the opposite direction.

"Watch it Potter" Severus sneered.

"Oh, sorry." James said and turned to continue to class.

"What, no insults or hexes? Too scared without your cronies to back you up? Huh, Potter?" Severus said, drawing his wand and advancing toward James. Suddenly a flash of red hair appeared between the two boys.

"He said sorry, Sev." Lily said, glaring at her former best friend with a hint of sadness in her eyes.

"Oh, so now you need the mudblood sticking up for you." Severus taunted mockingly.

At this, James reached into his robes to draw his wand. He felt Lily's hand grab his wrist to stop him.

"No, James. He's not worth it." She said, sadness and resolution in her voice.

"But Lily! He called you a-"

"I know James. Please, just walk away. For me." Lily said, pleading with him softly.

"Okay, Lily. For you." James placed his wand back into his pocket. As he turned to go he said resolutely, "You know Snape, I pity you. You gave up the best friend anyone in this world could have asked for. And what did you gain? Prejudice and hate. I consider myself lucky to have Lily in my life. I know you did too, once. You have given up that right by using that hateful word. It didn't have to turn out like this."

James turned back to Lily and the two walked silently to Advanced Transfiguration, standing closer together than Lily had ever allowed. Class dragged on for both. James couldn't get the sad look in Lily's eyes out of his head and Lily couldn't wait to talk to James alone. They both happened to have a free period immediately after class before DADA. As soon as Professor McGonagall dismissed class, Lily raced out of the room, not giving James a chance to stop her. She waited just inside the door to their private common room, hoping he would come back there.

Finally, she heard his footsteps and the door creaked open.

Their eyes met. After a moment she whispered,

"Yes James."

"Yes what?" he responded, confused.

"Yes, I will go out with you. You impressed me more than I could have imagined this morning." She said, a cheeky grin slowly making its way onto her face. She advanced towards him slowly.

"But what did I do?"

"You actually listened to me. You didn't fight even though you were provoked more than enough. Your words to Severus this morning meant more to me than you could possibly comprehend. Thank you, James." She said.

His confused expression quickly morphed into a grin as she reached for his tie and tugged his face down level with hers. Her lips found his as her arms wrapped around his neck and his found their way around her waist. She wrapped her legs around his waist as he maneuvered them to the couch where he laid her down against the plush cushions. He sat back, worried he may have taken things a bit too far. Lily took in his concerned expression and used his tie to again tug his lips down on hers. They both moaned as she wrapped her legs around his waist and felt hardness pressing against her center.

Unbeknownst to the two lovers, the portrait door opened and Sirius came rushing in with another poorly planned idea for James to impress Lily.

"James, I've got an idea-oh, never mind." Both Lily and James looked up, sheepishly.

"Sirius?" Lily said sweetly.

"Yes, Lily-bean?"

"Get out." She said, throwing a pillow at his head. He jumped and dodged, the pillow barely missing his head.

"Hey! No one messes with the hair. Not even you, Lily-kins."

"SIRIUS, GO AWAY!" They both yelled.

"Fine, fine, fine. I know when I'm not wanted." He huffed, making his way to the door. "Be responsible, use protection!" He yelled cheekily. Another pillow smashed into the door just as he closed it behind him. Sirius grinned and walked away whistling. Lily and James were officially together. All was right with the world.

Thanks for reading! Please leave a review, I really appreciate any comments or (constructive) criticism.

Catherine Parr


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